What It Means To Become A Listener

Pineapple Support provides free emotional support 24/7 to people within the adult entertainment industry. We want to support others so they never have to feel alone. Having someone there to listen can make all the difference in someone’s life. Active listening is a great way to support someone. It’s not solving problems, it’s helping someone feel heard, valued, and understood.

Pineapple Support have joined up with 7 Cups of Tea, one of the biggest and best emotional support platforms. When you join Pineapple Support, you not only get to feel good about doing something awesome.

– You become part of the community that genuinely cares and helps others. As a listener, you have access to peers, other listeners, and mentors.

– You develop excellent active listening skills, which will strengthen your relationships, improve your confidence, and equip you to deal with conflicts.

– You get free hands-on training that is designed to help you learn by doing. As 7 Cups says, training is directly relevant and immediately applicable to your life.

Here is how it works: 7 Cups provide free online training & support – all you need is an internet connection to get started.

• Free active listening course

• Online volunteering from home (or via app!)

• Control your own availability to listen

• Get certifications to boost your resume

• Get support & coaching from friendly mentors

• Feel amazing that you are making a difference in other peoples lives!


To become a listener follow this link and click on the orange tab at the top of the page “Volunteer as a Listener”


Dr Jena Field

Why You Should Be Ashamed Of Yourself

We might think we feel ashamed when we don’t do the things we set out to do. For instance, when we overindulge, skip the gym, or put our foot in our mouths. But what we are feeling in these instances is not shame, it’s guilt. We often use these terms synonymously but they are actually very different.

Guilt is ‘I did something bad’; Shame is ‘I am bad’.

Guilt alerts us when we do wrong whereas shame is when we feel inherently wrong. This may sound counterintuitive but sometimes feeling ashamed is the best thing for us. (Stay with me here). I am not saying that we should feeling bad about who we are. I am saying that often we already feel shame and we don’t realize it.

The most common cause of anxiety and depression is what psychologists call negative schemas – or long-held beliefs about ourselves – such as ‘I am not good enough’, ‘I am not smart enough,’ or ‘I am unlovable’.

We develop these negative self-beliefs when we are children. Often we have no idea that we have them but they influence every decision that we make. When we cling too tightly or reject a romantic hopeful, a negative schema is often to blame. It makes sense when we think about it: if deep down you believe that you are unworthy of love, wouldn’t you be overly anxious about losing someone you care about?

The tricky thing is that shame hides, even from ourselves. Most the time we don’t realize we feel it because it is buried under other emotions. It’s often the culprit behind defensiveness, perfectionism, and people-pleasing.

You’ve got to feel it to heal it.

The only way to stop the negative influence that our schemas and the subsequent shame have on our lives is to identify them. When we uncover negative self-beliefs, we can finally challenge these beliefs and change them.

Some positive news about negative schemas: they are never true.

1) Schemas are based on a child’s logic. Like most child logic, there is a hint of truth mixed with a whole lot of supposition. When we are children, our brains construct schemas to make sense of our surroundings and to help us survive in the world. For instance, a schema like, ‘I am not good enough’ stops us from trying new things and consequently protects us from the pain of failure.

2) Children blame themselves for much of what goes on around them. Children tend to attribute trauma – parents divorce, Grandma’s stroke, or the departure of anyone important – to their own shortcomings. Which is one reason why, ‘I am unlovable’ and ‘I am not good enough’ are the most common schemas.

3) Schemas are overly simplistic. Another very common schema, ‘I am not smart enough,’ is a great example. We may get terrible grades at school but academic tests are only one of many ways to measure intelligence. There are (at least) nine other types of intelligence including interpersonal, physical, creative, and emotional.

Uncovering your negative self-beliefs is just the first step.

Negative schemas are stubborn. They’ve been in our brains for a long time and won’t disappear the moment we uncover them. We’ve got to work at it. I’ve written a number of posts explaining how shame and our inner critical voices harm us. And what steps we can take to change them. Check it out at http://themonkeytherapist.com/category/guilt-shame/

Too Strong To Be Weak

I like to consider myself a strong woman, I know myself, I love myself and I never pretend to be a person that I am not.

So why did I allow myself to be emotionally bullied to a point where I turned my back on a career that makes me happy?

Admittedly when I met this man I was in a delicate state, lonely and bored. Bored is always a dangerous one! He seemed so lovely, exciting, caring and the rock I so needed to lean against. He was aware from day one of what I did as a career and was supportive and apparently intrigued by it. Then everything changed, he fell in love, apparently, I don’t think a narcissist can know what love truly is. That is what he was, a narcissist, in the purest form. The only way he took pleasure was in putting me down, draining any ounce of positive energy I had. He would talk about my job and my friends as if they were tarnished, he would shout and scream at me if I so much as mentioned anything to do with the fetish industry, fuck, I couldn’t even put my hair in victory rolls without a bitter remark. In the end it just became easier not to talk or do anything that was remotely related, this included going to events and seeing my friends.

Of course once this was removed from the relationship he soon found other reasons to shout at me and put me down, and I put up with it. Why? For two years. Why?

Eventually I sorted myself out and kicked him out of my house, but it still confuses the shit out of me. How could I allow someone to make me feel this way? I know I will not do it again. Life is too short and too precious.

Full Yogic Breathing Exercise

Full Yogic Breath or 3 part Breath

Almost everybody not uses full lung capacity, which can lead to disorders.

Breathing is life.
Breathing is healing.

Why Do This Exercise?:

By learning to breath properly you IMPROVE BREATH CAPACITY.
It can PREVENT disease or even REVERSE harmful conditions that can lead up to disease.
Each practice promotes VITALITY AND RELAXATION in only 1 single exercise.

Invest 5 up to 10 minutes of your time or even less to notice the benefits!


Do NOT use strain
Make the Breath smooth and effortless
Go slow and easy

Most important benefits of full yogic Breath are:


Other benefits are:

– release of muscular tension around the heart and digestive organs
helps to overcome the fear of shortage of Breath
Increases cardio vascular system
Improves detoxification
Amplifies auto immune system by increasing energy flow to the endocrine system.


Visit Katja’s website www.ReinventYou.me


A Blog of Thanks

When I began this project, I had no idea how many wonderful, kind people there still were in this world. It is easy to get blinded by all the negativity in the media and forget that the majority of people are inherently good.

Launching Pineapple Support, I had no idea what I was letting myself in for and so far the journey has been incredible, learning so much about the nature of people and even myself.

So for the 1st blog post on PineappleSupport.com I would like to give thanks to some of those who have gone beyond the call of duty and helped make this dream a reality.

Pat and the team at 7cups, you made the impossible possible. Thank you for believing in Pineapple Support and all that we strive to accomplish

Glen at CSDesign agency, thank you for dropping everything and coming to my rescue…. a lot. You really have gone above and beyond.

Bernadette Giacomazzo, publicist extraordinaire, you donated the most valuable commodity, your time. Thank you.

Ian at Woven Inc, after 16 years of friendship, thank you for not only putting up with my indecisive ramblings, but also producing the highest quality merchandise.

Nic at Highground Design, the brave man who agreed to design the PineappleSupport.com website. Little did you know just how many expletives a woman could use in one sentence, thank you for not telling me to f*** off yet.

Jena Field, my friend, my copy write and the very first therapist to get on board with Pineapple Support. You have helped me more than you could ever know. Thank you.

Michele Karban, Pineapple Support therapist, one of my closest friends and closest neighbours. I am very aware of how irritating I have been, thank you for helping me arrange the hectic mess that was my mind…. and for still speaking to me.

Christina Carter, Kimmie Kaboom and Nyssa Nevers, my sisters from other Misters, thank you for your love, your support and for always being at the other end of the telephone whenever I have needed you. I love you.